Fear Of Missing Out: Why Your Feed Is Making You Miserable

When I first read the words ‘positive mental attitude’, an image is instantly conjured up of a caricature. That person is the typically overly-enthusiastic and sickeningly proactive ‘go-getter’.

The #fitfam who posts ‘no-pain-no-gain’ as they complete their third workout of the day, washing the sweat and muscle aches down with an acai-coconut blend.

The recently-promoted business executive who just had their highly-anticipated board meeting and landed their pitch after many sleepless nights and hours in front of a computer screen.

The student who made a hundred revision cards, laminated them, cross-referenced them with the wider reading list and aced the module.

Okay so I’m embellishing slightly, and whether we know these people or not, chances are we’ve wanted to be one of them at least once in our lifetime. That isn’t a bad thing, nor is it a bad thing to have achieved this status: you put in the work, you deserve something back, right?

Having read Jamie Varon’s thought-provoking piece, ‘This Is How We Date Now’, I began to consider how much of the imagery and anecdotal evidence projected to us on social media is comfortably curled up in what I like to call ‘the blanket of betterness’. When describing relationships, Varon makes the controversial statement:

We do it. We find it. Then, quickly, we live it for others. We tell people we’re in a relationship on Facebook. We throw our pictures up on Instagram. We become a “we.” We make it seem shiny and perfect because what we choose to share is the highlight reel. We don’t share the 3am fights, the reddened eyes, the tear-stained bedsheets… We don’t tweet 140 characters of sadness when we’re having the kinds of conversations that can make or break the future of our love. This is not.. Read more of this post over on Zusterschap.

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